Telekinesis

If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hand

Geology

In geology class:
Name three types of rocks-

1. Classic
2. Punk
3. Hard

I See Dead People

Next time I'm alone somewhere and someone starts talking to me, I'll whisper, "You can see me?"

Star Gazing

So, I was laying in my bed, gazing at stars, when I saw I beautiful comet pass by. Then I thought to myself, "Where did my roof go?"

A Horse Walks Into a Bar

So a horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human language, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.